Saturday, May 25, 2013

Upcoming Funkmaster V Calendar


RASSLE/ WEDDING/ NEWSPAPER/ RADIO/ TAXICAB UPDATES UPDATED:
(Now with more DJ DREW)



June 1st- TV TAPING in Oneida TN- Cancelled
June 8th- EGO PRO- Sweetwater- E.T. Youtube TV Title Match- vs. Conner Cruze- FIRST BLOOD MATCH
June 13- Maryville Daily Times "WEEKEND" Front Page Interview with Funkmaster V
June 15th- SAW- Maryville- revenge match vs. Jim Miller 
June 20th- "The Mothership w/ DJ DREW" 90.3 UTK 8PM cohosting and big announcement!
June 22nd- Funkmaster V performs private wedding
July 1st- Funkmaster V's Uptown Cabs of Renown begins business!!!

It's Comedy Week on Youtube!

Here's a Double Shot- bang! bang!


NUMBER ONE
It's Comedy Week on Youtube! This was a video package shot during the time that I was struggling over the first time my Youtube TV Title was stolen from me. The Reverend Jay Perkey was on the phone Billy Marshall, trying to figure out what to do with me as I approached mental collapse. Jonathan Schwartz aka David Branson and I never saw eye to eye.



NUMBER TWO 
I've posted this one a bunch, but it's probably the funniest family friendly-ish thing I have done as a babyface in a vignette. Dwayne Windham won a briefcase at TXW Scramble for the Gold 2, but it was a booby prize- he had to be someone's valet for one month. The commissioner let me be his boss, and through the month I made him dress up as me, shot him out of a cannon, wear a dress on TV and other unmentionable acts. But "Kiss Justin Beiber 5 BUX" has always been a favorite. ENJOY!

KISS JUSTIN BEIBER 5 BUX



Thursday, May 23, 2013

It's Comedy Week on Youtube!!!

It's Comedy Week on Youtube. Watch this embarrassing video from the days when I was a weird, paranoid man and the kids didn't have to worry about puberty and zits.

"CLICK HERE TO SEE -A KID HYPNOTIZES FUNKMASTER V"

Wednesday, May 22, 2013

It's Comedy Week on Youtube!!!

It's Comedy Week on Youtube. Watch this irrelevant, award winning promo named "FUNK'S FRO" from the foolish minds of Funkmaster V, Barry Allen,Corey Lauth the Tsunami Kid, Spoony Mack, and Ricky Valentine back when TXW was fun.

click here for "FUNK'S FRO/ BARRY ALLEN FINDS THE MOLE"

Saturday, May 18, 2013

Funkmaster V's Uptown Cabs of Renown



Sometimes in life, you wake up and have to admit that life isn't all about pretty women, funk music and killing hippies with the Red Fist of Funk. Sometimes, it's about hauling drunk people to safety. I haven't been on in a little while because I have been preparing Knoxville for "Funkmaster V's Uptown Cabs of Renown"! We will be a 24-7 cab company servicing the Knoxville area. More info to follow suit, but we will probably be rolling by the first week of June. More info to come!!!

FACEBOOK OUR FUNKY CAB BUTTFACES!

Wednesday, May 1, 2013

Funkmaster V Shares a Memory From the Buggy Boy Rivalry.

Since white people seem to be talking about TXW tonight, I will share a TXW memory online for the three people that have learned how to give a care. I wasn't always a nice guy in wrestling. My clumsy intro into wrestling involved a large, masked man who pushed Shopping carts to the ring and talked to them like they had feelings. His name was Buggy Boy. I was involved in screwing around with him for months... but never wrestled him in a match until about a year or so into the rivalry. Now, when I finally got my mitts on him, it was for the TXW Youtube belt that had a strict ten minute rule at the time, and the match wasn't great. Because I was involved with so much behind the scenes stuff at that point, I forgot my frickin gear, it invloved an airplane spin that forced poor referee Mac McMurray to take a bump, it was outside and hot, etc. But what was great was when I got the advantage on Buggy Boy, I went outside the ring, picked up a hacksaw, and started sawing the shopping cart handle off of his precious shopping cart. Mac MacMurray, hero to all shopping carts, screamed for the young security guard to "STOP THAT MAN". Now... this super-thin kid, shouldn't have been a security guard. He couldn't stop an asthma-ridden 8 year old from running to the ring to pants Mac MacMurray. This skinny guy started trying to shoot wrestle the hacksaw out of my hands. Now, this is fricking dangerous. Me and him are wrestling over this damned hacksaw like we are the hero and villain in some Alfred Hitchcock climax. The blade flung back and forth, dangerously close to the fans. I screamed "What the hell are you doing?" The boy says "Mac told me to stop you!" I screamed "Dude, I'm not a crazy person! Let go of the damned thing!" Finally, and thankfully the situation resolved without incident. I was able to roll back in to score a time limit draw, but the shopping cart was saved from damage thanks to that really skinny security guy that used to come to TXW shows. Here is an important post match video featuring me celebrating the time limit draw and the fact that I didnt lose a finger from TXW MAIN EVENT TV.